holding pattern

I am antsy today. It's a day where I know big decisions and big changes are ahead, but I can't do anything yet. Tonight is my final job interview, which means that after 2 months of interviewing and thinking about it, I'll finally have to make a decision. In all actuality I think I've already made the decision, but once I make the commitment, there is no turning back. And I'll actually have to go through the unpleasant task of leaving my current job.

Also, my formal training for Antarctica starts Friday with a 13 miler. Where I was already doing 9-10 mile long runs this summer, I'm skipping the first few weeks on the plan.  Now that long run is looming out there on the horizon, and I'm anxious to get it done. I want to test my fitness and see if I'm really where I think I am. After listening to the Extra Mile Podcast Experiment and reading Jeff Galloway's book cover to cover I want to try the walk breaks and see if it makes a difference.

But for today, there is nothing I can do except wait.

I'm back

Obviously I took a break from blogging for awhile and I don't really have great reason why. After the marathon my running didn't have any direction. I kept running, because I do have that compulsive need to run daily. But I didn't have any motivation, any fire. Outside of running, I've been pretty busy as well. Work is intense, as my manager and 2 other supervisors have left, and I'm left to pick up the slack. I'm currently debating leaving as well, I have 2 very good offers with consulting companies, but I just can't make up my mind. It's my natural aversion to major change, but also the hesitation about the consulting life-style. Do I really want to travel every week? It's pretty impossible to have a life. Not that I have a lot holding me back right now- no boyfriend (I won't bore you with that story), no geographic restrictions. I come home from work, do a second workout, and sit on the couch. I can do that anywhere. I vacillate hourly.

But on to the exciting news. My passion and fire for running is back. This is inspired by two things.

#1 I did the Reach the Beach Relay last weekend. After months of running alone, mostly on suburban streets I forgot what it's like to be out in the wild in the elements with the support of thousands of runners and a wonderful team. Even though I ran alone during my of my legs, I could see the blinking lights of other runners stretching out in front of. I had my team-mates stopping every couple of miles to cheer me on. I knew that thousands of other people were also out in the rain and the dark, staying awake for days straight, cooped up in stinky vans, all for the love of running.

#2 I AM OFFICIALLY RUNNING THE ANTARCTICA MARATHON IN FEBRUARY. After 4 years on the waiting list, I'm in!