A grudge is the hardest thing to bear

I won't lie, a huge part of why I exercise is for cosmetic reasons. Many days what gets me out of bed and out running or to the gym is simply the calorie burn. But this week I was reminded of the other reasons why I exercise.

It had been a stressful week at work, so by Friday morning I was fried.  Thursday night I ate too much junk so I woke up with a food hang-over. The last thing I wanted to do was go to the gym, but I dragged myself there anyway. Half-way through my strength work, I realized that I was easily lifting weight that I'd struggled with just a few months ago.




I love that feeling of making progress. I also love being strong. It allows me to do so many things, like say, re-arranging my living room furniture at 3 am when I can't sleep (that happened this week.) After strength I went to a step class. We had new choreography and new music and there was such a sense of energy in the room that it totally revitalized me. I left the class with a literal bounce in my step and head full of happy tunes.



This morning I woke up a bit of a mess. The BF and I had a little spat last night. It wasn't anything major, and was probably partially fueled by the number of mint juleps I had at the Kentucky Derby party. So I was a little hung-over and just couldn't seem to move beyond the little fight. It was a perfect Maine spring day, bright sunshine and crisp cool air, so I headed out in my bike for a brick workout. I biked 6 miles to the Scarborough marsh, ran 4 miles on the marsh trail, and then took the long way home biking 11 more miles. I sweat out the alcohol toxins, drank clean water, and filled my body with fresh air. It was one of those times when I needed to feel physical discomfort to remind me that the silly things I was agonizing over in my head didn't matter.


On the second bike I passed a church and their big sign out front read " A Grudge is the Hardest Thing to Bear." Seriously? If that isn't a sign, I don't know what is.




For the rest of my ride, I tried to imagine any remaining resentment being forced out with every exhale and peace and happiness flowing in with every inhale. I wish I could say I got home feeling 100% better, but I am not that big of a person. I am terrible at letting things go. But, I did feel a whole heck of a lot better.